In a world that is increasingly about self-development, we seem to lose sight of the greatest good: each other. The emphasis is on me, my growth, my path, my success. But the further we develop ourselves, the more we seem to get lost in the loneliness of the ego. For what happens when the self becomes the center of everything?
Doubts about the self become greater. We strive for perfection, for personal goals, but lose something essential along the way: connection.
Self-development mentors and coaches are popping up like mushrooms these days. On the one hand, that’s wonderful. It is valuable when people get to know themselves better, heal old wounds and make more conscious choices. But there also seems to be another side to it. Digging to deeper and deeper layers is no longer a path to connection for many, but an endless journey of the ego. A new form of “more. More insight, more healing, more me. And in that process we lose the other. The fellow man disappears into the background, while the focus remains entirely on the self.
In South Africa there is a different mindset. There they say, “I am because you are.” Ubuntu. A philosophy of life in which your own existence is intertwined with that of the other. Where you are only human, in relation to others. This is not a weakness, but rather a profound strength. It is a recognition of mutual dependence, of humanity, of love.
In Indonesia you also see it: families taking care of each other, living together, considering each other. The community is central. It is no coincidence that feelings like loneliness and depression are much less common there. Because where people live with each other, security is created. Warmth. Portability.
The we thinks with each other. It connects, communicates, feels. The we brings reverence and humility. It reminds us that we are not separate islands, but part of a greater whole.
I myself learned: on my own I went faster, but together I got much further. That deep lesson stays with me. We are not meant to do it alone. And we don’t have to do it alone either.
Here in Holland, we seem to lose touch with the soul. We run from yoga class to retreat, from coaching program to business retreat. Always looking for more – more growth, more insight, more success. But who carries you when you fall? Who really knows you, when you’re just working to become a better version of yourself?
At Boost the World Foundation, we believe it can be different. And should. It takes a village to raise a child. Not the individual, but the community bears. Not the ego, but the heart. The world does not need even more self-optimization, but more together. More we.
The self will never become fulfilled. The ego always wants more. But love, true connection, begins where the self steps aside. Where space is created for the other. Where I gives way to we.
Let us return. To humanity. To community. To a world where I exist because you exist.
Love, Rosanne
